This is a wonderful way to celebrate an 80th birthday... I wanted to be 65 again, but they wouldn't let me - Homeland Security.
Tax reform is taking the taxes off things that have been taxed in the past and putting taxes on things that haven't been taxed before.
I worship the quicksand he walks in.
I've known Don since he came to Washington. When he first came to work for George W. Bush, he was a different Don Rumsfeld. He was jolly, full of life, and ready to go to war, but only if we could win.
A humorist has to be taken seriously before he's considered a real writer.
A bad liver is to a Frenchman what a nervous breakdown is to an American. Everyone has had one and everyone wants to talk about it.