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Stuffed deer heads on walls are bad enough, but it’s worse when you see them wearing dark glasses, having streamers around their necks and a hat on their antlers. Because then you know they were enjoying themselves at a party when they were shot.
β€” Ellen DeGeneres
Tags: humor, death

Other Quotes by "Ellen DeGeneres"

My point is, life is about balance. The good and the bad. The highs and the lows. The pina and the colada.
β€” Ellen DeGeneres Seriously... I'm Kidding
Tags: life, humor, funny, balance
Here are the values that I stand for: honesty, equality, kindness, compassion, treating people the way you want to be treated and helping those in need. To me, those are traditional values.
β€” Ellen DeGeneres
Tags: people, you, me, kindness
Portia and I constantly say to each other, 'We are so lucky.' Sometimes it's lying in bed at night before I go to sleep, and I just say thank you to whatever, whoever is out there.
β€” Ellen DeGeneres
Tags: go, night, sleep, you
I was raised that you don't use something nice until there's someplace to go.
β€” Ellen DeGeneres
Tags: something, nice, go, you
I've moved about 10 times over the past 15 years. I don't move for the sole purpose of getting rid of stuff. I'm not crazy. I also move so that I never have to wash any windows.
β€” Ellen DeGeneres
Tags: purpose, never, past, crazy
View More by "Ellen DeGeneres"
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