My photographs don't do me justice - they just look like me.
You know you're old if your walker has an airbag.
We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.
My own laugh is the real thing and I've had it all my life.
Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going.
The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.