I was in love with a beautiful blonde once. She drove me to drink. That's the one thing I'm indebted to her for.
Never give a sucker an even break.
If I had to live my life over, I'd live over a saloon.
I never drink water; that is the stuff that rusts pipes.
I once spent a year in Philadelphia, I think it was on a Sunday.
I'd like to see Paris before I die... Philadelphia will do.
