We had a cat in college named Chloe, and it was the most evil, awful cat in the world... When we left, we used to close the door, and its paw would come underneath and try to paw us.
I feel like I've contributed monumentally to the success of the gay movement in America, and if anyone wants to argue that, I'm open to it. You're welcome, 'Advocate.'
I listened to George Carlin when I was a kid and knew every word of his routines.
Each individual human being has a lot of stuff that nobody knows about. Nobody knows what anybody else is going through at any point in their lives.
I think the worst thing you could ever do is label comedy. I'm a fan of the broadness of Lucille Ball, the subtlety of Peter Sellers and the oddballness of Fred Armisen and the wittiness of Marty Short. I'm a fan of all of it, and I want to do all of it.
I was the music director at a dinner theater called the 'Pheasant Run Theater' in the suburbs of Chicago, and that was my side gig while I acted.
You build a fan base over time, and they will accept you as long as it's good. Nothing matters as long as something's good. If it's bad, nobody will see it.
When I came out of my mom's womb, I had 'sitcom' stamped on my forehead.
No, my entire life is planned. It's called time management.
I had so many friends over the years - so many, out of the woodwork, telling me, 'When are you coming back to TV?'
