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They had me on the operating table all day. They looked into my stomach, my gall bladder, they examined everything inside of me. Know what they decided? I need glasses.
— Joe E. Lewis
Tags: know, glasses, day, me

Other Quotes by "Joe E. Lewis"

Adlai Stevenson has a genius for saying the right thing, at the right time, to the wrong people.
— Joe E. Lewis
Tags: genius, saying, people, time
Whenever someone asks me if I want water with my Scotch, I say I'm thirsty, not dirty.
— Joe E. Lewis
Tags: want, someone, water, me
Show me a friend in need and I'll show you a pest.
— Joe E. Lewis
Tags: need, friend, you, me
I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster.
— Joe E. Lewis
Tags: go, tired, doctor, me
I play in the low 80s. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play.
— Joe E. Lewis
Tags: low, than, play, sports
View More by "Joe E. Lewis"
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