Hobbes: Do you think there's a God? Calvin: Well, somebody's out to get me!
I think hiccup cures were really invented for the amusement of the patient's friends.
Ms. Wormwood: Calvin, can you tell us what Lewis and Clark did? Calvin: No, but I can recite the secret superhero origin of each member of Captain Napalm's Thermonuclear League of Liberty. Ms. Wormwood: See me after class, Calvin. Calvin: [retrospectively] I'm not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.
Did you ever wonder if the person in the puddle is real, and you're just a reflection of him?
Look! A trickle of water running through some dirt! I'd say our afternoon just got booked solid!