To find out if she really loved me, I hooked her up to a lie detector. And just as I suspected, my machine was broken.

Tags: word-junkies, women, suspicion, relationships, machine, love, life, lies, lie-detector, lie, illusion, illogical, humor, honesty, honest, funny, deny, denial, deception, deceit, broken

Other Quotes by "Dark Jar Tin Zoo"

If you have the woman you love, what more do you need? Well, besides an alibi for the time of her husband’s murder.

Tags: yearn, word-junkies, women, woman, wife, want, time, relationships, need, necessity, murder, love, justify, justification, insane, husband, humor, funny, desire, crazy, alibi
I make love with a focus and intensity that most people reserve for sleep.
Tags: word-junkies, women, sleeping, sleep, sex, romantic, romance, reserve, relationships, not-romantic, men, make-love, love, intensity, intense, humor, funny, focus
Our love was a two-person game. At least until one of us died, and the other became a murderer.

Tags: word-junkies, relationships, murder, love, life, humor, game, funny, death
I had a dream about you. At first you were a mannequin, and I was a fashion designer. Then, inexplicably, we switched roles and I became the mannequin. But instead of putting clothes on me, you laughed at my nakedness, and you sold me to the owner of a sex shop. 

Tags: sleeping, sleep, relationships, life, humor, funny, dreams, dreaming
I had a dream about you. You looked like you, but you also looked like a mannequin. And I looked like me, but I also looked like a mannequin. Between the two of us, we were too fake even for Hollywood. And as such, we were forced to reside in Washington DC.

Tags: sleeping, sleep, relationships, life, humor, funny, dreams, dreaming
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