What am I responsible for? Who am I responsible to? Everybody? How come when Archie Bunker nailed everybody, it was funny - but when I do it, it's not?
Not that I want to put the entire rap music style down - I just don't like it. And I know somewhere there's gotta be another guy like that. There's gotta be a guy just like that - just like me. There's gotta be somebody, somewhere... Maybe, maybe an assassin type.
I got divorced, which was not a good thing for a revivalist minister. It did not go down well. I'd already been banned from a couple churches for my jokes. So one day I woke up and decided it was time to start living for myself.
In the 1990s, it's OK to do comedy about the Chernobyl disaster or the Space Shuttle blowing up. It's acceptable to ridicule the Pope or the President of the United States, but God forbid you do a joke... about gays. The gay community is the last sacred cow in this society.
I've never been against women. That anti-feminist rap is bogus. I think men should be nice to women, buy them diamonds.
It was great to be the rock comic, the shock comic. But after you've played Giants Stadium with Bon Jovi in front of 82,000 people, after you've done the 'Wild Thing' video with Jessica Hahn and every rock band from hell, you're not gonna top that.
I have lived a carnal life.
Anyone can go out on stage and start beating people over the head with rubber chickens. That'll get people's attention.
So many people counted on me to be the party, I had to move far enough away that they wouldn't want to drive there.
If I get married again, I want a guy there with a drum to do rimshots during the vows.
I'm a comedian, and my comedy has never endorsed violence towards gays.
I'd rather entertain people than offend them.
I guess my main influences are Jesus, rock 'n' roll and ex-wives. In that order.
Every generation has someone who steps outside the norm and offers a voice for the unspeakable attitudes of that time. I represent everything that's supposed to be wrong, everything that's forbidden.
So many of these comics are just frustrated singers or actors - they want to get a gig doing a sitcom. It's paint-by-the-numbers comedy, lame joke-telling. They're drawn to it as a career move.
My view of life is, 'If you're going to miss Heaven, why miss it by two inches? Miss it!
Jim Bakker. He's lost everything, he's ruined. And the worst thing of all he still has to wake up to her!
I want to show people that there's a side of myself other than just the outrageous comedian.
It was like going to church, except Ozzy Osbourne was there.
You don't know what a rough crowd is. If all I have to do is go make people laugh, that's nothing. Let me tell you what a tough crowd is. A tough crowd is going to a morning service and you got six people there and you gotta pat your house payment. That's a tough crowd.
